John's Recovery Story

I was raised in a Christian home with a godly father. I was even baptized when I was 13. I was open to God, but did not understand what Jesus did for me. At Christmas time when I was at Iowa State University. At a dorm meeting a young man and lady shared how Christ had died on the Cross. I thought I understood, but I really didn't. That night I was at the lobby and they were playing unclean movies. At that time someone yelled out “Let's invite the Christians in here.” I went home thinking about this.

On Christmas eve, I was reading a book and it said when we stand before He didn't look on the outside appearance. He looked on the heart. It said if I didn't have a clean heart I would have to pay for my sins and be punished in hell. I then had my eyes open and realized Jesus had already paid for my sins. I asked Jesus to forgive me and cleanse me. I almost could see Jesus' blood cleansing me. I then thanked Jesus and told Him wherever He wanted me to go. Whatever He wanted me to do I would be willing.

After truly receiving Christ I was allowed to be attacked, because I was into the occult I was attacked by the Enemy right away. After this the struggles with strange thoughts lead me yo a condition called Bipolar or manic-depression.

After four years, God opened my eyes further as I called upon the name of Jesus. After this the struggles with strange thoughts of the illness would be healed. God would grant me to stand upon a solid rock foundation. I want to glorify God by Him meeting my needs for wisdom and strength. There is a verse that says that those who know the name of Jesus as Savior. You can put your trust Him.

If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead. You shall be saved. From then on I knew that God had heard my prayer.

Another point in my life came when I was at a retreat. I woke up the revelation that truly Jesus was alive. This too would strengthen my faith

As I faced the mental condition, God would continue grow me spiritually. I would be delivered from drugs, alcohol, and pornography.

I want to share what this looks like. As I share through Jesus' eyes. He gave me wings to fly above negative things. I call this “Getting John's wings.”

Getting John's Wings

My John’s healing continued as I placed within his heart that in everything he could give thanks. John found the answer to the anxiety he still had, was faced in the verse: “Be anxious for nothing but by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known unto God and the peace that passeth understanding shall guard your hearts and mind through Christ Jesus.” I have designed thanksgiving to be the way out of anxiety. Also as you call upon my name, as I am the Word of God, the Bible becomes even more powerful.

John was learning thanksgiving as a lifestyle. As he did this he began to experience My verse: “Those that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength they shall mount up with wings as eagles, they shall run and not grow weary, they shall walk and not faint. “  John was receiving his wings that would allow him to fly above any situation and find love for those that are around him. Truly as John was thankful He did not need to hang unto those things that caused his anxiety.

A major thing was also if I asked anything according to His will He would hear me and If I knew that he heard me I would receive what I asked.

This is called Seven Affirmations of the Christian Faith.

7 Affirmations Of Our Christian Freedoms

As John applied thanksgiving to his life he received a fullness of the freedoms I have for all my children. These freedoms are given because all My promises are true through the verse: ‘If we ask anything according to My will, I hear you and if you know that I hear you, you know that you have the petition you have asked for.

The first Spiritual freedom I give is: “Trust in Me with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge Me and I will direct your paths” I offer this freedom to you so that you may Trust Me and find My Guidance and will for you.

My second Spiritual freedom is: “That you would know Me and the power of my resurrection and the fellowship of My sufferings being made conformable to My death. Truly to know Me is one of your greatest blessings. Another verse puts it this way: ”Let him that glories, glory in this that He understands and knows Me, that I am the Lord that exercises lovingkindness, justice and righteousness for in these things I delight.

The third Spiritual freedom is what lead John to a more intimate relationship with Me. In everything give thanks for this is My Father’s will in Me concerning you.

My fourth Spiritual freedom is that you can live for Me. Truly if you have this desire. I will truly make it possible. Again if you ask anything according to My will, I will hear you.

My fifth Spiritual freedom is that you can love like Me. What does this look like? It’s being able to love others as they are with no judgment. Truly this is the kind of love that changes those lives that are around you. “For My wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, easily entreated and full of tender mercies. This has to do with having wings like eagles and soaring above others hurts, discouragement, and anger, also circumstances. To love as I love is I receive everyone just as they are. For while they were yet sinners I died for them.

Truly no matter wherever anyone is at in their spiritual growth, they can be meet with love and understanding. The prayer for them is to grow in grace and find true change. This has become John’s new prayer for friends and family.

The sixth Spiritual freedom is the freedom to be pure like Me. Truly as you grow in purity you will see Me more and more clearly. Being pure is such a great gift to walk in. As I give you a clear conscience, you are more and more assured of My presence and answered prayer. “Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see Me.”

The seventh Spiritual freedom is you can come to Me at anytime through faith. As you come through Me you can enter My Throne of Grace. By a look of faith My Father receives and sees you as His little child. For the Father is found through childlike faith. Resting on My strength and not your own. Truly My Grace is sufficient for you for My strength is made perfect through weakness. Truly anyone that comes to Me I will receive them and lead them to My resting place.

Truly God is glorified as we ask for the things He wants. He will provides.

Today I don't have to battle with strange thoughts. The last thing I recently learned was by Faith we can put everything in God's hands. This is what faith is all about.

Christian Advocates For Mental Health

Mental health trouble is very confusing, especially when Christians face it. Mental breakdowns can happen to even Christians. My sister and I are examples of how it can happen to  Christians. Even in the  same  family. We both suffer fr om manic depression or Bipolar. Our Grand father and mother also suffered with mental illness. Just like physical  illness has happened because the Fall and sin of Adam. Mental illness comes from the fall. Just like Alzheimer is example of the mind being affected.

My  mental illness came after I heard a voice that I was going to die. Because of this panic attack my mental illness was triggered and my mind was altered. From then on I would have to face a variety of ways of confusion. The Good News was I had come to Christ and received His forgiveness. God would allow the Bipolar to happen to me to show I could bless others by my recovery and the things I faced. God has been glorified by giving me poetry to share His great love for His children. God has also given Cindy and I medicine that can correct this mental health condition. Very confusing, but true. I have grown Spiritually and I have  received medicine that has given me recovery from my condition. Indeed God is good. God would also give me more and more wisdom to help me to overcome my condition.

For One Soul

For one soul,

Has my pain been borne,

For one soul,

I’ll seek His face.

For one soul,

I’ll suffer disgrace.

Why?

For one soul,

He did not turn away,

For that One Soul given,

You see,

Was for me.

He exchanged His life as a plea,

For me to stand before God,

Righteously.

By that One Soul,

I enter eternity.

Like He,

For one soul,

I’m willing to be torn.

For one soul I’ll suffer disgrace,

For even one did He did not turn away.

For that One Soul given,

You see was for me,

Into eternity.

Romans 5:8

But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

This is the most powerful poem I have ever written

 

Three Greatest Words

These are the three greatest Words,

By which we hear as the Cross is near.

True Words of Faith,

True Words of Grace.

The Last Words spoken

As the final breath is taken,

As the world is shaken.

As death brings forth life,

As His Love is magnified.

As the payment is complete,

As the Son now intercedes.

What are these three Great Words?

“It is finished”

As the Son declares it for all Eternity.

“It is finished”

By the Only One,

The Everlasting Son.

Will you look and see.

Why these Words are needed,

To enter into The Fathers Kingdom.

How do we know it's True.

By His Resurrection

Three days later is in view.

These three Words,

“It is finished”

Says the Gospel of God's Love.

Has come down from above.

To a world in need.

Of these three words,

For all Eternity.

John's Rock

God has given me a rock to stand on. For a long time I've tried to find assurances like Whosoever shall call upon the name in the Lord shall be saved. But I've found a stronger verse to trust that doesn't involve my faith but to focus on Jesus. Jesus said it's finished and I can trust Him and stand upon that promise and not worry about my faith. It is finished and I can trust in this as a solid foundation. It's not about me but Him totally.

Jesus In My Heart

Come into my heart Lord Jesus, there's room in my heart for Thee. This has been my constant prayer for the last month. I found myself lost and without faith. Then God said "Come unto Me all ye that are weary and heavyladen and I will give you rest.Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me for I am meek and lowly in heart and you will find rest for your soul.For My burden is light and My yoke is easy." I then called upon Jesus to come into my heart. I've known the Cross for 40 years and called upon Jesus' name for 36 years. Yet God opened my eyes to ask Jesus into my heart in a special way. I told this story to my Mom and she said I could continually pray this prayer for Christ to dwell in my heart. This was the freedom to know that I had done this  and continue to ask for His presence in my heart. To me it seems that Jesus has walked with me for forty years. Yet my heart is now filled with His' Presence. Truly I am most blessed by Him.

It's About Him

I was at Sunday evening discipleship meeting. The question arose if you have ever been blessed by your Father. I found myself talking about how my Dad called me one of the greatest man he ever knew. I was convicted of my pride. Then God opened my eyes that it wasn't about me, it was all about Jesus. I remind myself daily about this truth. I have found freedom as I exercise this truth. It is even a good response to sin and my assurance. I urge you to do this, too.

Blessings,

From John the Poet

Temptation And Overcoming

God has shown me what to do when I face temptations. I remind myself it's not God's will and it really isn't my will either. What do I do in this situation. I remind myself to love God and make a decision to hate this sin. Truly as we ask for God's will it will happen.

For if we ask anything according to God's will He hears us and we know that He hears us we know  we have the petition we asked of Him/

What do we hate?
The lust of the eyes, the lust of the flesh and the pride of life.
What do we do instead? We count it all joy as we face any temptation.

Then we remind ourselves.

Be anxious for nothing, but with prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known  unto God and the peace that passeth understanding shall guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

Simply Love God and hate sin and you'll find yourself in the center of God's will.

For extra strength we can also remind ourselves that we are crucified with Christ that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth I shall not serve sin.

I hope this helps you,

John the Poet

Cleansed and Forgiven

God cleansed me of my sins Christmas of 1979. I received Christ's death for my sins by grace through faith. As I saw Him bleeding for me. Now God has given me further boldness and a sure faith.

As I confessed trying to be perfect and to keep the law.  I found that truly even this sin can be forgiven through confession. Not only cleansed, but I have found full freedom from the Law.
Truly God's Scriptural prayer has been answered in my life.

"For this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ . Of whom the whole family in Heaven and Earth is named. That His Word might grant me according to the riches of His glory to be strengthened with all might in the inner man. That Christ might dwell in my heart by faith. That I  being rooted and grounded in love might be able  to  comprehend with all the saints. What is the breadth and length and depth and heigth of His love. Being filled with all the fullness of God.
Now unto Him that is that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all we ask or think according to the power that worketh in us. Be glory in the Church by Christ Jesus.  World without end.."

"But to him that worketh not but believeth on Him that justifieth the ungodly, His faith is counted for righteousness."

The Greatest Sin To Be Forgiven

Truly, the greatest sin to be forgiven is not our flesh, but the desire to be perfect before a Holy God. Truly God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Even the sin of unrighteousness of trying to measure up. As we confess this sin we find Jesus hearing this prayer of repentance. Bringing hope and assurance that can not be broken.The Spirit now rejoices in our heart and we finally find peace. Truly this forgiveness is the greatest blessing and gives us the full righteousness in Christ.

After years of searching and even writing poems that were completely true. The battle for my heart has found a resting place. Knowing the heigth and depth and breadth and length of His love.

Truly the chains have fallen off my soul and I can fly with the Eagles. Will you join me in bowing the knee and confess this sin of trying to be perfect. Truly you shall know the Truth and the Truth shall sent you free in the Presence of the God of Eternity

My Testimony

A Blessed Law

God has blessed me with an incredible Truth and Law. The Law of the Spirit of Life in Christ Jesus has set me free from the law of sin and death. What this means to me is there is is no need to be perfect. Instead I am free to live the Spirit of Life giving me the ability to love in freedom and not perfection. Perfect is truly overrated. Just by dwelling on this Law of Love over rides any panic attack that says I have to be perfect.

I heard a great quote, "I may not know what is in the future, but I know I can do the next loving thing." Truly Christ can be my righteousness. As I love I am free to fulfill the law of the Bible. As the sermon on the mount says that when we love we fulfill the law and the prophets. What freedom is in this law of the Spirit of Life in Christ Jesus. It is truly a law we can receive and do. So much for perfection.

Walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh. Be filled with the Spirit speaking to one another with Psalms, Hymns, and Spiritual songs making melody in your hearts to the Lord.

An added blessing is that I have the privilege to worship My Lords and Savior by asking Him to lead me in His Worship.

Blessings Abounding

God has been blessing me with more and more assurance and also boldness to share God through the website, email and Facebook. Everything is working out for good. By God's grace I am not experiencing panic attacks and I am able to take less and less medications. I believe that as I turn 55 years old in April, that this will be my most blessed year of sharing my poetry gift. After 36 years of writing (God's in it for the long haul) doors are opening to share more and more. I have three important dates coming up. Easter on the 20th of April, my birthday on the 21st and my Dad's passing on the 22nd. I can not wait to hug him in Glory. It's great to see my mom growing spiritually and her ministry at her care facility. God is indeed good.

Jeremiah 9:24
But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the LORD which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the LORD.

Words Of Assurance

God has spoken to me through the years to lead me to more and more assurance. The first thought that touched me was "My grace is sufficient for thee, for My strength has been made perfect in weakness." Truly grace is found as we walk in God's will. We can be in the middle as "In everything give thanks for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." Truly as we give thanks we find ourselves walking with God. The second thought came as I realized I was double minded and unstable in all my ways. I had found myself trusting in my salvation experience and my poetry to prove my salvation. God showed me that I couldn't trust in this. but to simply Trust God. I simply remind myself to Trust Christ alone. The next thought of assurance came as a small voice said, "John I love you no matter what and I will worship God no matter what." This has been a blessed thought to ponder. My last thought of assurance after I was having a feeling of condemnation. God allowed me simply think of Jesus' Words as the Cross, "It is finished." Truly I can trust these words no matter what I am feeling. Truly looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the Cross, despising the shame and is set down at the right hand of God the Father.

Merciful God

I shared my poetry and testimony on my birthday. I struggled greatly , but was able to share about my Dad leaving us and being in heaven. If you can feel unsaved I certainly felt it. Even though I was speaking Truth, my heart was panicking. The next day didn't know where to go from here. God says it is not him that runs or him that wills, but God that shows mercy. I asked God if He was willing to show me mercy. The next day I found My God to be merciful. God is good and ready to forgive and plenteous in mercy unto all that call upon Him. I left God with the decision to share mercy to me. Now I know now that I have a Merciful God. Truly this is the knowledge I have longed for. God's mercy endures forever. Nothing can separate me from the love of God in Christ Jesus. Truly God is merciful to sinners. When you truly need God's mercy, God shows up.

A Still Small Voice

After several months of fighting panic attacks. God gave me an answer. The panic attacks came from fear and great anxiety. There were times I had to simply fight the attacks with Scripture. I would dwell on that Christ loved me and gave himself for me. I also had to wait on the Lord for strength. I also had to take anxiety pills. Some of the attacks were so hard and powerful that on a scale of one to ten they were ten's. I had to also apply James Chapter one to my situation. To count it all joy when you fall into divers temptations and to ask for wisdom. My battle came to a head while visiting a friend in a Care facility. The Enemy sowed a seed that maybe I was really working for my salvation and that was the reason I was doing what I was doing. I went to the car to battle once again. I called on Jesus, if He was there please help me. After a few minutes of battling, I heard a still small voice. God said, "I love you no matter what." This was God's perfect love that could cast out my fears. Truly at anytime I can think about God's voice telling me I am loved. My response was to love My Savior back. Presenting myself as a living sacrifice. Coming to Jesus and putting His yoke upon me. I can now find rest for my soul as Jesus' burden is becoming light. Truly I can dwell on Jesus' love, the Cross, Resurrection, and Ascension. Truly Jesus intercedes for me to the Father and I know a Love that motivates me to love God back. God loves me no matter what and He deserves worship no matter what. John the Poet

Knowing A Love

Recently, I got a chance to share Scripture and poetry as a testimony. Truly I was able to Glory in My God and my infirmities, As I did this In was able to acknowledge God's love for me. Truly God has blessed me by thinking about God's love and that Christ gave Himself for me. Now all I have to do is think about that love and know that love. Truly, this love is casting out my fears and anxieties. By applying Ephesians 3:14-20, I am finding a rest in the breadth and length and depth and height of His divine love. As the song says, "Think about His love, think about His mercy, think about His love that sees us through." I find this love by simply dwelling on Jesus. I have also been blessed as my faith is being tried and patience works itself in me.

Faith and Money

As an American we are naturally bent towards thinking money is the most important way for God to meet our needs and desires, We are truly blind to how God really wants to work in us. I myself struggle with this kind of covetousness. God clearly declares we can't love money and God both at the same time. I've discovered an answer to this focus on money. This is not a one time confession to solve this. This is a weed that must be cut down daily. It is so strong a sin that we can understand how it could be a root of sin. What is our answer? As we find ourselves thinking daily about money, we must remind ourselves where true worship should be. We must apply the command, "Thou shalt worship the Lord your God and Him only shalt thou serve." For with this weed daily confession is needed and redirection toward the Worship of God. As we apply this truth we shall discover that we shall know the Truth and the Truth will set us free.

God And The Promise Of Riches

“My God shall provide all your needs according to His riches in Glory by Christ Jesus.”

God has blessed me with the ability to share Christmas poetry with over 160 people. I also was blessed to share Christmas gifts with a friend of mine's children and grandchildren. It was such a blessing and opportunity to share. It was so worth doing.

I had a trial come about over this and how God provides. With this giving I used up all my funds. I thought that God would provide for all this giving. Yet it didn't happen. I also thought God would provide for every good work. I trusted Christ for this promise. I went to God and asked why He had not provided.

God lead me to a greater Truth. If God always provided for all needs at all times, what about those in prison and those faced with starvation. Our culture is so focused on money that we think this is how God always blesses us. I think of Paul in prison. If God always provides, He would have to apologize to Paul. God declares food and raiment therewith to be content. Truly God has blessed me with my true needs being met. What about those believers in prison, hungry, and persecuted? What is God's true riches in Glory by Christ Jesus?

“Being content with such things as you have, for He has said I will never leave you nor forsake you.”

The answer to the hardship is God's Glory is found as Christ being with us in every trial, every hardship. This is truly the blessing God will always provided.

A side Truth is that when I was pondering the answer to this trial. I thought of this promise.

“My Brethren, count it all joy when you face divers (trials) temptations., Knowing this that the trying of your faith works patience, but let patience have her perfect work that you may be perfect and entire wanting nothing. If any of you lack wisdom let him ask of God that giveth to all men liberally and upbraideth not and it shall be given him.”

Truly the promise is when trials are happening, we need to find God's wisdom for this trial and gives us a deeper understanding how God works.

Hope Maketh Not Ashamed

I've been thinking about the time between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. One is the Jewish New Year and the other is The Day of Atonement. Jewish legend says that during this period God looks down on the Earth and considers the Jewish people. I was thinking this would be a good time for the Rapture to take place. The Bible clearly says we are not to know the hour or the day, but the times and the seasons. As I focused on the Rapture coming, God then blessed with a desire for Christ's return and a greater assurance of my faith. After Rosh Hashanah came I was a little anxious. Could I possible be left behind? God led me to various Scriptures for assurance. Then God gave me a promise that was God's answer to the question, why should I let you into Heaven? The answer is the promise, God loved me and gave His beloved Son for me. I've God's Word on it. Oh, what Great joy. Oh, what Great love. Oh, what Great assurance. What a great Promise.

My Goals

It's good to have goals to shoot for in life. We are made internally to work towards to these goals. I have spiritual goals for my life. They are: Glorify God and enjoy Him forevermore, touch lives, keep myself unspotted from the world. My new goal I received from a message my Pastor on a Sunday night service. It is the highest goal We can seek. To live a life worthy of the Gospel. God has also been showing me the constant need to ask for wisdom. We never arrive at wisdom, but need to be hungering and thirsting after that wisdom. The promise is if we ask for wisdom, without wavering, we will walk in this. Another way is to walk in the Spirit and to be filled with the Spirit. Truly we can learn to be seeking day and night.

Psalm 1
"Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. But his delight is in the law of the Lord and in His law doth he meditate day and night and he shall be like a tree planted by rivers of water and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper."

Take Me To The Father

After hearing a fresh presentation of the Prodigal Son story, I learned that in a Jewish family when the prodigal son left and squandered his money that in order to keep the family intact, it was the older brothers role to seek out and find the younger brother. It was his job to bring the erring brother to the Father. In this story we find the self righteous older brother was not even happy to hear that his younger brother was returned to the family. An interesting insight that this fresh telling of this story is that Jesus is our true older brother and truly He seeks to find and save the lost. This unique picture of Jesus coming to find me inspired me that it is truly through Jesus that I am brought to God the Father. I called on Jesus with a renewed understanding that Jesus will take me to the Father. After this Jesus revealed His love toward me as the work of God's love would be Jesus being my advocate to come to the Father. How can Jesus do this? It is by the love that He showed on the Cross that makes it possible to bring us to the Father. Truly think about His love, think about His mercy, think about His love that will see us through. Another insight in coming to Jesus that I am both like the sinning prodigal son and also the self righteous older brother. Truly in this story God the Father wants both to come into a loving family relationship with Him.